what everybody else is writing about today

i am sitting at work, watching the first of the election returns come in via the cybernet. this is the opening salvo of results; predictably bush is carrying GA, W.Va, IN, KY, while john kerry has VT. i've been tormenting myself with anxiety and anticipation in the weeks leading up to these very minutes. since august, i've followed the campaign daily, sometimes hourly. i've carried a mini cauldron of belching stomach acid in my gut since at least last weekend. i feel like i am back to drinking coffee. i slept restlessly last night, even woke up an hour early this morning.

during the debates i spent tense hours behind the steering wheel of my car fighting bay bridge traffic, listening closely on the radio, my heart rate jumping every time john kerry gave an answer. after a surge of adrenaline, my nerves would wane with each confident response by kerry, or each robotic retard reply by president bush.

i'll be relieved when today is over, but that will be a fleeting moment if bush is re-elected. i can't say what i would do that happens. it's not the america i want